What to Do When Life Throws You a Curveball
What is a curveball?
A curveball is one of those times when everything is going well, and then all of a sudden, something unexpected happens. Not the happy kind of something either, one of those things that really knocks you off balance and was completely unexpected. This is exactly what happened to me recently. Not one but three, in quick succession, and they were both major and really threw me. Two seriously impacted my business and one was a health scare that had me in A&E.
Life can be like that though! Everything is going great and then you just have one of those months where nothing falls into place and everything feels wrong. It is called Life!
Knowing that I needed to take a step back and see what I needed to do to maintain my sanity and my business, I did just that. This is one of the keys to Real Resilience. Noticing when you are experiencing the stress response and doing something about it.
What to do when life gets difficult and stressful
Step 1
The first question I asked myself was, what do I need to do for my business and myself to stay resilient and not collapse under pressure?
Looking after my health and that of my employees is always my first priority. Making sure that I have the headspace and the personal space to think about what is happening. Then I can formulate a plan and think about what needs to be done to manage the various situations.
The first curve ball also felt quite personal, so it was really important to manage my mindset and stay positive. I did some deep breathing and got my brain and body out of panic mode.
Like most people, in stressful situations, I feel stressed when they have just happened. However, I notice my stress responses almost instantly and immediately start following the process to get back to balance.
Deep breathing sends the right signals to the brain to turn off flight or flight mode. You cannot think straight when you are in fight or flight, the body shuts down to only be able to manage essential body functions. Thinking rationally is not one of them. Such a simple step but so critical to maintaining Real Resilience.
Step 2
The next process I go through to manage whatever curveball has been thrown is a bit of root cause analysis. Basically, what I wanted to know was why these things had happened, and could I have done anything to avoid them?
For the first situation, I realised that my communication around expectations could have been more detailed. This was really good information to have. It meant that this was situation I could avoid in the future. While it did not resolve my current issue it was still a great lesson learned that would help me in the future. I am comfortable with making mistakes and learning from them, it is how we grow and develop as leaders.
For the second curveball, I understood that there really was nothing I could have done differently. It really was an unexpected situation. However I could make sure that I had all the correct processes and procedures in place to manage the situation. A quick call to my HR legal go-to person confirmed I had followed all the right steps and had all the right things in place. So the question now was, what could I do to minimise the impact on my business and not keel over with extra work myself? What was my Plan B?
Now I felt like I was in control and taking action. While I could not throw back the curve balls by having a plan and lessons learned, I still felt I was in control. This was a really important step. So often when we feel fear, anxiety, or want to resist change, it is because we feel we have zero control. That is a very uncomfortable place to be. However it can be a great place for learning and changing things around. Streamlining and coming up with new ideas. Never miss the opportunity to catch a curve ball.
While I could not avoid the situation, I could definitely take ownership of my response. Then I could make a plan and take action which put me back in control and able to move forwards.
So how could you apply this to your business or personal situations? What is keeping you up at night?
Take these simple steps.
- Breathe.
- Manage your mindset.
- Carry out root cause analysis.
- Plan alternatives,
- Take positive action.
If you have employees resistant to change, you can also apply this process. People resist change because they’re out of their comfort zone and feel like they have no control. Talking to them, explaining things, getting them involved in the way forward. Can often resolve resistance.
Step 3
Personal health care. So after being in A&E and finding out I might have gallstones I immediately researched what I could do to manage the pain. A quick trip to my go-to acupuncturist and I feel much better. I have to go through a few more tests and will have to change my diet for a while. There is a silver lining though – weight loss. I’m sure this topic will be the subject of a future blog.
